Cracking the code

Follow me here. The half-nekkid lady is Kim Kardashian. She's the daughter of the late Robert Kardashian, the O.J. Simpson defense team member with silver-streaked hair who looked completely aghast in the famous "Not guilty" verdict footage.

Kim's mom is the ex-wife of Bruce Jenner, the Olympic decathlete who got one too many nosejobs and last year made us all embarrassed with his appearance on ice skates on Fox's frozen rip-off of Dancing with the Stars.

Bruce has many children, one of which is son Brody, who has no career but somehow ranks a swank pad in L.A. He's dated some of my favorite reality show Twinkies, including Kristin Cavallari of Laguna Beach and Nicole Richie of "Help Me, I'm Smaller Than a Weeble!" or whatever her latest series of paparazzi photos is captioned.

Brody now is TV-fake-dating Lauren Conrad, who spun off from Laguna and currently occupies space between other skinny blondes on MTV's The Hills.

Bruce Jenner has a lot of kids. Like, dozens. They're all very pretty. If he got a whistle and taught his kids to sing, they would look like the So-Cal version of the Von Trapps.

One of Kim (above) and Brody's half-siblings is Kourtney Kardashian. She appeared on the reality show on E! that sent rich kids like her and greasy Fabian Basabe to the Rocky Mountains for a fake trail drive. She also attended our favorite university for two years, (before transferring to the University of Arizona).

But it just goes to show you...if you're a blogger who hasn't posted anything in a week, you can come up with the lamest connections to relevance in order to put a half-assed ho pic on the page.